I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!!

OHHH MY WEEK JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER!!!

Official weighin today .... At 5.50am getting up and ready for ambo duty today I hoped on the scales and my eyes jumped out of my scull like a cartoon character!!!

99.8kg!!!!!!

Can you believe it???? I'm struggling to .... I'M IN DOUBLE DIGITS!!!! FINALLY!!! After 18mths I'm finally under 100kgs!!! Ohhhhh those numbers looked so beautiful today!! I was dancing round the room singing 99.8 ... I'm 99.8 ... 99.8 ... I'm 99.8!!! While Bill trying to sleep grumbled at me ... I didn't care ... I'm 99.8!!!!

So in one week I lost 5kgs!!!!! exactly!! 104.8kg I was last Thursday. I've never lost that much weight in one week!!!! Shows what complete determination can achieve!!! And this is the most determined I've EVER been to lose weight!

And to top it off I was talking to the First Aid tutor here at the station this morning who lives in Auckland (there's a First Aid course being held at the station today) and we got talking about my Auckland application and she said if you need a place to stay on your days up there come stay with us. Absolutely perfect!!! She's with St Johns so she understands my work, they're a retired couple (so no late night parties to keep me awake) with no kids at home in a 4 bedroom house and they both work during the day (so I can sleep when I need to after night shift) and they were looking for a border!!! I can't believe it!! Fantastic!! Ohh and she's on a weightloss program too so no temptations!! She just has to go home to talk it over with hubby but she said she thinks it will work out perfectly!!! And she's a sweetie!!!

Ohhhh this is all just perfect!!!!! Doin the 90's girl jig today I tell ya!!!

Flu jab ... is it worth it?

So much for having my free flu jab ... I got the flu!!! Almost back to normal now just a nagging cough lurking around.

Still no word on my job application yet, they're taking a while.

Weighin on Wednesday brought a 700g loss. I'm picking my brains to find a strategy to get below the 100kg mark. This one is so physcological for me and I'm not sure why. I keep bouncing around that mark and just can't quite get under it. A big part is that I still feel like I have such a long way to go. Remembering back to when I did Jenny Craig nearly 20yrs ago my start weight was exactly 100kg ... that was JUST my START WEIGHT!!! And here I am 20yrs later still at 100kg!!

With some of my friends stopping blogging I've lost my accountability or more importantly that comrardery, the hype that builds eachother up to get through those tough moments. I really need to sort something out here. The local ww meeting closed down months ago and I don't want to go to SureSlim (too expensive for me). And I get so busy, time is an issue.

I'll have to keep thinking on this one. But for this week I've had my first two days OP so that's a good start.

Back from AWOL land ...

I've been AWOL from bloggerland the last week. Well I haven't been totally not blogging just not publishing my posts and doing them in draft only. I've decided an the end of the week that I'm not actually going to publish them. It's nothing against you guys but I've had a seriously emotional week and dealing with a lot of very tender personal issues which I feel wouldn't be appropriate to put on here.

Now don't going worrying yourselves about me or my family - we're fine. To give you a basic outline - I went to a job last Wednesday that involved a suicide in which my ambo partner and I were first on scene and we were unsuccessful in reviving him and it really hit home because I knew him. St Johns were fanstastic and had a huge amount of support there for me both immediately after and over the next few days. It affected me big time causing me to have nausea and vomiting for a few days and tossing and turning at night. I think I'm working through it ok, however my emotional stress is nothing compared to what his wife and young kids have to deal with. My heart just goes out to her!!!

Next step is the funeral on Monday which might bring a few emotions back up again.

I found my eating was very minimal over the week as my stomach just couldn't face it. But I tried very hard to eat what I could to keep my energy levels up. I weighed in at 100.5kgs this week which is a good loss but a weighin post last Wednesday just seemed so insignificant with what happened that day. So I've chosen to leave it till today to post.

Now I've worked through some of the stuff (blogging privately helped alot with this) I'm back to 'normal' blogging again.

was good but not for me

Greenlane diet week is over and I managed to lose 600g. Not good enough results for me to keep doing it. I'm happy with a 600g loss but the sacrifices I had to persevere with don't make it worthwhile.

I found after the three hard out days I went into a rebellion mode with food. Kinda like the noose is off now so 'LET'S EAT!!!' The book says you can lose up to 4.5kgs in 3 days. We all know that won't be 4.5kgs of fat!! After day three I was down 2.6kgs but of course as soon as I went back to normal eating again my gut filled up again and I was back up another 2kgs over the following 4 days.

So I'm back to counting points again. It's always interesting how take something away makes you appreciate it. Very glad to be counting points again and eating 'normally'.

Onto another eating healthy week. Only 1.3kgs to go to get into double digits!

Don't run away mojo!!

Firstly ... 'Me' ... the guy's name that wrote Diary of a Fat Man is Paul Jeffreys. (published by Penguin Books) Hope that helps. I must admit I tried to do a search on the net to find a pic for yesterdays post but found very little info on it. I wonder if they pulled it from publication when he died.

This new menu plan is working out great for me! (the Greenlane one I talked about yesterday). It's really hard to stick to and I'm finding I'm getting really hungry (like stomach majorly growling at me hungry) between meals. I think this is a good thing for me right now. I got so used to the points system where if I got hungry I just ate and used the points from another day.

Get this ... I've EVEN gone to black coffee/no sugar!!! (normal is white/1 large tsp sugar) And it's not actually too bad!

As you may recall I had beetroot for my menu dinner last night. I had raw beetroot there that I was going to cook up. But not wanting to add sugar I found a recipe to roast them with garlic and balsamic vinegar which in theory sounded devine ...ehem ... 2.5hrs later everything else was cooked and we were still waiting for the beetroot. I gave up, took it out of the oven and decided to boil it ... half an hour later I thought they must be cooked. The kids had eaten everything else on their plate so I peeled the beetroot and dished it up. "YUMM!! Beetroot like grandma does!!" came their excited replies. They started hooking into it as I peeled Bill's and my portions. "Umm, it's okay, not quite as good as grandma's beetroot" I heard them say. As I took a bite of my beetroot I was discusted!! It was revolting!!! Still crunchy and raw!!! Those poor kids ate their beetroot without another word! I just couldn't eat mine! YUCK!! I gave in and went and got a can of the stuff out of the cupboard. "You kids want any more of the canned stuff?" "No mum I'm full" Poor things! lol

We finished the night off with our allotted ww icecream and baked apples.

This morning it was worth it all with a loss of 600g on the scales for my weekly weighin! Very happy given I've only been on this plan one day.

My food for today is ...

Breakfast - 1 boiled egg, 1 slice dry toast, 1/2 banana

Lunch - 1 cup cottage cheese, 5 snax crackers

Dinner - 2 Frankfurters, 1 cup broccoli, 1/2 cup carrots

Snack - 1 cup ww icecream, 1/2 banana

My mojo may very well be on it's way back!!

Thankyou letter

Another 400g gone this week. Definately not complaining about this one, given I did indulge in a little bit of chocolate over Easter. Not huge amounts tho. What I did find was that the 4 or 5 easter eggs made me cave in to other temptations.

I'm definately an all or nothing personality, so when I slip up in one area I find it hard to keep tracking my food and stay OP. I know all the theory behind this and did manage to stay ontrack ... just. I guess my focus was gone this week.

But that's all good because this is the first day of a brand new tracking week for me and I managed to squeeze in with a loss. So what am I actually complaining about?? lol Not actually sure. Guess I need to refocus my motivation and give myself a kick up the butt and be grateful the scales were nice for the few indescretions.

Onto other news...

The shop was crazy busy over Easter! It was our biggest Easter yet, one day we were up by over $2000 for the day (compared to Easter Saturday last year). That definately helps ... ohh except for the fact that Bill paid $3000 to the wrong person last night on internet banking!!! A big $3000 whoopsie!!! The stupid bank wouldn't help us because we couldn't tell them our phone pin number! And of course he had to pay another $3000 to the CORRECT person ... I tell ya sometimes I think that man is a natural blonde under that dark cover!!

Ambulance has also be crazy busy over easter with so many people here at the beach. No major catastrophe stuff which is good. Been doing study this week (for my Nat Cert in Ambulance) on irregular heart rhythms and then recognised an odd ecg rhythm strip on a job and was able to query what heart condition she had. Very cool feeling to have my study actually come together on a job.

There was a letter this morning in the local paper from a patient I took to hospital (well it was the mother of the 18mth old patient) ... rather than reword it I'll type it in here for you ...

Volunteers' effort a priceless asset ...

This letter is dedicated to all the mainly volunteers who work for organisations who assist people within the Waihi area.

Our son has a severe condition where quick response from a doctor and St John is essential.

We are highly impressed and very thankful for the unselfish effort the people of Waihi/Waihi Beach put into this mainly volunteer work.

We were recommended to move closer to the hospital but we think we are better off living in Waihi where midical first aid is extremely professional, quick and effective.

Thankyou all very much to the people who support and help us.

A town is just as good as its inhabitants - Waihi rocks!!!

When people ask why I love ambulance so much .... this is why!!

who needs a soap opera ...?

I'm very happy to report a 100g loss today. Much better than the horrid gain I thought I would have. It's just the kick start I needed.

Thankyou all so much for your wonderful comments. Blew me away with your support.

I'm still getting used to this new computer with it's little quirks, but we've come to be quite attached to eachother now. The first night the internet kept freezing and I got frustrated and closed it, giving it some abusive names.

I've since learnt it was infact the modem/internet that was playing up not my laptop. I had to apologise for the name calling. Must have worked because she's behaved well ever since.

Had to take Malachi (10) to the doctors yesterday. The school had rung up to say he was in the sick bay with a 'croupy' cough. I said to the office lady over the phone that I don't think it would be croup. Kids grow out of that around 5 or 6. He had it a couple of years ago and was considered very old for it then at aged 8.

I went down and picked him up anyway and on hearing his 'bark' cough had to admit to the lady that she may be right, it did sound like croup (damnit I had it when I'm wrong!! lol).

Sure enough the doc confirmed it ... a very surpising case of croup in a 10yr old. He had a really loud audible wheeze you could hear from over a metre away. Not much the doc could do as to give him steroids late in the day would mean him being up all night (makes them ultra alert).

So we hoped and prayed he wouldn't get worse overnight with the temperature drop. Gave him some panadol before bed and rang the ambulance crew on duty to prepare for a possible callout if he did worsen.

But surprisingly enough he slept through the night and seemed alot better this morning. So I think he's over the worst of it and managed to get better himself without any further medication.

Well that's my day's 'shortland street' episode.
Back to normality again ... touch wood!

Damn! Damn! Damn!

Bill bought me a lovely new charm to celebrate my 20kg loss mark ...

In his words it's 'graduating past 20kgs lost' ... graduation cap. I wore it with pride all week. Now I feel like a complete hypocrit because with fluid and my week before TTOM craving sugar, sugar, sugar ... lead to a 1.6kg gain this week ... BUGGER!!!

Not much else to say really... stupid teary hormones have started today too ... Sometimes it sucks being a woman!!!

Happier than a cat with 10 fish!!!

I was shocked to see a weight of 101.1kgs on the scales this morning ... I stood in stunned silence for a moment. My weight has been the same all week (if not slightly up) and thought I was going to have another 100g pathetic loss like last week ... but no!!! 

1.6kgs gone!!! And that means .......

... I'VE LOST 20KGS!!! Yabba Dabba dooooooo!!!!

No make that 21.5kgs I've lost!!! *big grins*

Sooo ... you know what else that means???  A new photo (finally) to put on my blog ...

Before ...

20kgs gone ...

Don't really like to skite but there's no one else I can skite to, so sorry guys ... I'm quite chuffed even if I do say so myself!!!

Hmmm ... now which charm to choose!!

100g of boogers up there??

Well dag namit!! You wouldn't believe it would ya???

Soooooooooo close ... hmmm ... but no cigar!!

The scale flickered onto 102.6kgs, stayed for a few seconds and last minute jumped to 102.7kgs. I reweighed myself, sat on the loo (again), breathed in, blew my nose, even considered cutting some hair off!!! 100g loss this week ... 0.1kg off my goal of 20kgs in one year ... 19.9kgs lost (hmmm, doesn't quite have the same ring to it)

That's ok I guess, I'll still get to my 20kg loss mark, but it will have to be next week now!!

One celebration to have this week is that I did survive one whole year on weight watchers and still going strong!!

Keep running ... you're nearly there!!

The scales were very nice to me this morning and kept my lowest weight from yesterday at 102.8kgs! A victory of 1.1kg loss this week .... yeeeeehaww!!!

I started the Wendie Plan around 6wks ago now and it's certainly working for me, giving me some nice losses.

So I just now have to lose 200g this next week to make my mini challenge of 20kgs lost in one year.

Just don't blow it Lyn!!!

A loss? Wooo Hoo!!

Weigh in results ...

400g loss ... 103.9kg.

I'm very proud of this weighin given TOTM turned up this morning along with the bloating that comes with it. Now just 1.3kg to go till my 20kg lost mark and 2 weighins to do it ... 650 grams each week ... can I do it?? heheh I'll certainly try my darned best!!

Do ya love my cute puddy tat on this post? I shouted myself a pressie ... a year's subscription to an animation site so I can put cute animations on my posts again. I used to use smiley central (which was free but came with alot of spam) and when I switched over to Apple Mac I couldn't use it anymore. I missed not being able to use my smileys. I came across this one today and while it's a bugger it's not free I don't mind too much having to pay for it, means I won't get spam (I checked that I won't) and it's about the same price as a new top so I figure I don't buy myself much and this makes my website a bit of fun.

So watch out for the new animations ... can't wait to show you more!!

Focusing on the happy ...

I should be over the moon. My scales showed a weight of 104.3kgs ... a 2.1kg loss. But am I being silly for not being happy with that? I'm not sure what else I could have achieved.

Why the disapointment? ... I have gotten into a huge yoyo thing going on. I lost 2kgs two weeks ago, then put on 2.2kgs last week, now lost 2.1kgs this week. See the pattern? Is it a pattern? or is it just one week that I stuffed and now have gotten back on track again.

I know I'm probably overthinking this one and at the end of the day have to look at the fact that I've done the best I can this week and over the last 3 weeks have lost 1.9kgs.

Infact in the bigger picture I am coming up to my one year anniversary of rejoining weightwatchers. And in that one year I have lost nearly 20kgs. Infact that is my goal to achieve ... to have lost 20kgs in one year. I have until the 23 February to lose another 1.7kgs. That's 17 days or 2.5 weeks. To make it easier I'll take it out to the weighin for that week ... Wednesday 27 February I want to have lost 20kgs... you think I can do it??? 600g a week ... yep I'll do ... just watch me!!!!

And I've started bidding on a new pandora charm on trademe in anticipation of the event! :)

whoop woo whoop whoop woo!!!

My good eating has finally shown up on the scales with a 2.0kg loss recorded on this mornings weighin! Yay! Under 2kgs to go to get to my 20kg loss mark and my next charm reward ... wahoo bring on next week!!!

Short and sweet update today ... just wanted give you my results.

So unfair!!!

My initial step on the scales gave me ... wait for it ... a 200g GAIN!!! WTF???? How could that happen?? I've been so good this week. I had brief thoughts of jumping on them to teach it a lesson but chose to take my anger out on the padded seat of the weights bench next to the scales! My hand was grateful for it.

Ten minutes later and a visit to the ladies room and stepped on the scales again. 200g lighter giving me a 'stay the same' result ... still mad!! And for the next hour had a mental tantrum vowing to eat my way through the day. After all if I'm going to gain or stay the same I may as well enjoy it along the way!! How dare those scales be mean to me this week, I so didn't deserve that!!

An hour or so later I served a lady in the shop who used to come to my weight watchers meeting who has put on masses amounts of weight. Nothing against her because who am I to judge anyone for weight gain? I don't know what she's been through the last few years for that to happen. But what it did do was make me realise if I let this weeks result get to me that could be me!! I have no choice!! I HAVE to keep going regardless!!

So another day on track, even with my tantrum outburst!! Next week this fluid better be gone and teach those scales a lesson!!

Dis Santa's doin da boogie!!

Shhh!! I'm whispering this so Bill doesn't hear ... but ... guess what????


I AM LIGHTER THAN BILL!!! I AM OFFICIALLY IN THE LEAD!!! Whoop whoop!!! What a wonderful christmas present to myself!! Ohhhhhh yeeeaah!!!!! 1.3kgs I lost this week!!

I thought when I had a stay the same last week that hopefully the fluid would be gone this week, giving me a double whammy loss today!!

Unfortunately (and I'll say this real quick) Bill had a little itty bitty gain. And while I feel empathy for him, he's been cheating so nahhh I don't feel sorry for him. heheh!

And it's been a verryy loooooooong time since I've been lighter than him.

This brings my total to 18kgs lost and now have under 40kg to lose... woah still a long way to go but feeling good and confident I can make it.

Let's just hope I don't stuff it up over Christmas!! If I don't get a chance to say it ... hope you all have a fantastic Christmas!! Relax and don't stress!!!

That's ok ... better than a gain

Weighed in the same this week at 105.9kg. Happy with this given it's my TTOM week this week. Hopefully that means a good loss next week because Bill is gaining ground on me with a 1.2kg loss this week.

Off to a surprise birthday dinner for a friend tonight. Since I haven't seen the menu not sure how good I'll go on points but will try and make good choices... promise!!

Gotta get this house sorted before the babysitter arrives. Better get cracking!!

Best policy??

Weigh in day again ... this week I'm 105.9kg ... a 900g loss. I am over the moon with this result ... mainly for the fact that I've managed 5 weeks of losses in a row!! I'm really enjoying my relaxedness about it that I have at the moment. I'm able to just quietly track my food and live my busy and sometimes stressful schedule ... and still stick to plan.

Sometimes I have the tendency to get over passionate about weightloss and while there's nothing wrong with that short term, for me I find I burn out. I can't keep up that energy imput focussed weightloss without something else being effected and/or giving up.

For the last few weeks I've been able to just plod away at my tracking, having the blowouts, feeling bad about them but getting right back on track the next day.

It feels good, it feels comfortable. But as we all know comfortable CAN be a dangerous place to be with mediocrity soon taking it's place. And before I know it I've fallen off the bandwagon.

So how do I find the sensible ground in this? I guess by being stern on myself in regards to tracking and accountability, with honesty being the central point. Other things can and will go wrong some time but as long as I'm honest with myself and those around me ... THAT is what will get me to goal!!

We can do this!!

After I did my little skite about how I was able to not succumb to stress eating ... I did!! The very next night it all got a bit much and I ordered chinese chicken and cashew, spring roll and pineapple fritter! The next day I felt like such a failure and told my mate Mandy. She gently but sternly kicked my arse and told me to get back ontrack ... NOW!!

And it worked! I owe my loss this week to Mandy.

I guestimated 30pts for the day and saved a few points each day for the rest of the week. Slowly bit by bit my gain on the scales came down and down. And by yesterday I was showing a very small gain, so hoped like heck it would be at least a 'stay the same' ...

As I said yesterday I felt slimmer but who knew what today would bring ... and this morning ... 106.8kgs ... a 400g loss!!! yayy!!

Kate you were exactly right! Overnight it dropped by 600g ... phew!! Bill had a 600g loss, go Bill!! It's going to be a close race I think!

So this being my 1st of the month weighin shows a 4.1kg loss for the month ... The scales behaved well!!

Bill's nana nap

Weighin results ...

Weight last week: 107.7kg
Weight this morning: 107.2kg

So that's a 500g loss. Feeling a bit guilty about it because I was moaning all week about my weight being up on the scales and then last night I blow it and have pizza and drinks with another couple. And now record a loss.

Bill had his weighin too and ...ehem ... recorded a 500g gain... hey probably where my 500g went too! lol. So that leaves me with just 1.2kg to catch him up ... hehehe. Although I've been a bit kinda on him this morning because we all know how bummed we feel when we've gained. His normal cooked breakfast was replaced by a banana and natural unsweetened yoghurt! :)

Sorry I haven't posted todays post sooner ... I actually started this update 10am this morning, about 6hrs ago. Nona you asked how I could keep going doing everything, I'm not a superwoman but what I do do ... is absolutely crash when I stop. I have just slept for the last 3hrs!!! I was trying so hard to watch some movies on sky but couldn't keep my eyes open. Each time I woke up the credits were rolling. I did that through three movies!!!

Thankyou for all your hopes of a quiet day for me yesterday ... it seemed to work! We had just one job and was a lovely sweet gentleman who was not critically ill. And at the end of it I felt great!!! My confidence is back!!

Hey cool, I just remembered ... I'm half a kilo lighter! :)