Facing another fear!!!!!

So much has happened since I last updated on Monday ...

Tuesday I had the day off so spend the majority of it tweaking my website. I've now finished all the links on the right, including the 'cool links' page. I got the mouse rollovers working too, something I've been working on for a while. (hold your mouse over the link names and they will change then revert back when the mouse is taken off) Note: the first time you do this it will be quite slow but this should speed up the next time you visit. Although depending on your dialup speed it still may take a little while for it to work, just keep your mouse over top till you see it change (don't click on the mouse button tho)

Tuesday afternoon I had friends turn up for a visit. We spent a great evening together catching up. Just before they arrived I was eating my afternoon tea and my filling fell out of my tooth!!! I absolutely HATE dentists ... well not the dentists themselves but the pain they cause me!! lol I haven't been to the dentist in over 15yrs!!!

But with this filling falling out I just HAD to go because I had a huge canyon in my tooth that I could put my tongue into!!!

So Wednesday morning I did a ring around to find a dentist that had 'painfree' dentistry. I found one in Hamilton that advertised just this in their yellow pages advert. But on ringing them up they said that the 'painfree' part was an iv drip which had to be organised days in advance. I had to have this filling fixed today or I wouldn't go (yeah I'm a big chicken I know!). They said they could give me gas which would relax me. So off we went for a quick few hours trip to Hamilton. Dropped the kids off to mums while I nervously forced myself back in the car to the dentist .... I really didn't want to go but knew I had to.

I had to fill in a form on arrival and they said at the bottom to put any extra notes on the back ... so I wrote in big bold letters ... "Dentist phobic!!!!!" lol ... the dentist smiled when he saw it and got me to sit in the big chair that felt like it was swallowing me up ... I had the shakes I was so nervous!!! I told him about the filling that had fallen out, the black mark appearing on my front bottom tooth that was probably a hole going down under the gum line, the thick layer of plaque that had built up over the years on the back of my bottom teeth (which I was sure meant my teeth were going to fall out any day!), and the fact that I hadn't been in 15yrs so probably had a mouth full of holes!!!. Turns out the black mark on my bottom tooth was just a bit of tarter which he took off with a tooth clean, he removed the plaque from behind my bottom teeth and guess what? my teeth stayed in!! lol

Now going to the dentist is surreal enough but with the gas ... well that was a whole different story!!! To this day I'm certain the dentist and his assistant lady were doing dances around my mouth ... boogying to the radio music!!! It was quite bizarre!!!! But very enjoyable!! lol

He filled the hole (of course after numbing my mouth first) and then proceeded to inform me I had 5 further holes and a wisdom tooth that needed to come out. In my drugged up, 'happy world' state I said "Sure!, can you do it all now?" when he said "ummm no I've only booked you in for a half hour appointment, that will take a little longer than that" I promptly burst into tears!!! lol I said there was no way I would urge up the courage to come back again. He calmed me down enough and I realised that I hadn't actually felt any pain during my brief visit and that I actually enjoyed the feeling of this mysterious gas, so why not come back again?

I said what about tomorrow then? Ummm no booked up sorry. Friday? No booked. Saturday? No we don't take out wisdom teeth on Saturdays ... so in discust I said fine I'll come back another time then. I made an appointment for 7.45am the next morning to go talk to him about my xrays I had taken to see if there were any further holes and to see how difficult it would be to remove the wisdom tooth.

Probably just as well I slept on it because it didn't seem so daunting the next morning and infact decided to wait till we got back from Australia to have it all done incase it took a little longer to heal. I didn't want to be travelling overseas with a sore mouth.

So all in all I was pretty happy with only 5 fillings in 15yrs of not being at a dentist. And the dentist told me I had really healthy teeth ... yay me!! I almost asked him for a smiley stamp on my hand ... heheh!

So I think I have faced my Fear Factor and my next trip to see him won't be quite so nerve wracking. He's going to put me out to it so I won't know a thing until it's all over and done with and I'm getting all 5 fillings done at the same time as the tooth being taken out.

Now just to warn you all .... I don't want any horror wisdom tooth removal stories!!! I know how bad it can be (remember the event of Bill ending up in hospital last year with a wisdom tooth op going bad?) so for now I'm focusing on the positive and that my trip to the big, bad, ogor dentist actually was quite enjoyable!

ohhhhh ... and I got to pick up my glasses!!! wahooo!!! Feel like a trendy chickee now!! I took some pics today and put them in the pics above ... yeah like you hadn't already noticed!!! lol

So much for my quick few hour trip to the dentist ... ended up staying the night and only just got back now ... 36hrs later!! But the good thing is I can eat again now and other than the few holes I have in my mouth ... I have healthy teeth!!!

Things are really looking up now! I'm not pregnant, I'm losing weight, I have trendy new glasses ... and I have healthy teeth!!! lol


Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 74.8kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Scales blew me away tonight

I'm esctatic tonight!!! I was really hoping for a 500g loss but 900g is absolutely wonderful!!! I celebrated by getting two boxes of ww choc bars and the new ww magazine, so I'll sit down tonight and relax with a mag and choc bar.

We went out for dinner tonight and I did the assertive thing of asking for my dinner to be prepared a certain way. I normally don't bother. I just choose something that looks low fat. But tonight I asked for the dressing on the side, no chips and double the salad ... and to be cooked in the lowest fat way possible. I hate being picky as a customer but I'm getting better. It was absolutely scrummy!!! Chicken breast wrapped in bacon and a banana in the centre then apricot sauce (served on the side) with a humongous salad. 6.5pts!! wahooo!!

I did an "About Me" page last night (link is down the right side). I had a couple of wines before I started so was very descriptive in my wording lol ... but in the end after re-reading it today I kinda like the way I write when I'm half pissed lol. So I think I'll leave it as it is.

Well I'll sign off for now ... I'm just buzzing I'm below 75kg again!!!
Catcha! *skips off into the sunset*
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 74.8kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Another winner!!

I spent yesterday and this morning doing all the changes to this website. I'm really happy with the outcome ... and no adverts or popups!!! wahooo!!

Diary-x is a fantastic site... and it's only $20 per year to upgrade to a paying site where I can store photos on here too. The other sites I priced were all around the $150 per year mark. I'm really happy with this one and it's so much cheaper.

I even took some snapshots of me this morning for you guys to see. Sorry i had to take them in the mirror as I was here on my own. So I took one of my face too so you don't miss out ... heheh!!

It's so funny how when TTOM slows down I suddenly feel slim again. Might also be because I was wearing my new jeans and top too (the ones in the snapshots)

Worked all day in the shop (with another staffmember) 10am till 8pm tonight so I quite buggered about now. But earnt myself 5 bonus points in the process. We were running all day!!! We did an awesome turnover today with the school holidays and being such a sunny day. My wrist is very tired from rolling so many icecreams!!

And I didn't pick at all ... all day!!! Was a good girl I was!!!

Looking forward to weighin tomorrow night. Don't think it's going to be a huge loss on last week (I've never been one to lose over a kilo a week) but it should be a loss... I'll be very happy with whatever I can get!

On that happy note, I'm off to sit down with a few wines (all calculated in my points of course!! lol)

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.7kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

I'm still succeeding

Spent 3 days totally under the weather. I've never had anything that painful before ... that I remember anyhow!! It's finally starting to get better now.

While I was at the doctors the other day I got a pregnancy blood test done (ok Hailey you can stop nagging me now lol)

Ok great news!!! Test result came back negative ... I'm not pregnant!! I really didn't think I was but just needed to have someone tell me that lol. Stupid thing was I got the result Thursday midday and then Friday morning I got my period!!! lol 17 days late!!! Always the way, I bet if I didn't have the test done I still wouldn't have my period now!

My ear is on the mend, I'm noticing it better and better each day now. I'm still on panodol every 3hrs ... now for my ear AND terrible period pains. I don't normally have this many pains with TTOM but this month seems to be particularly bad ... presuming because it was so late. Feels like my body is one big pain throb ... lol ... but as Bill said last night AT LEAST IM NOT PREGNANT! very true!

We went to mum and dad's to stay (in Hamilton) for the Thurs, Friday. As usual she tried to sabotage me with baked cakes and fatning food. But this time I did pretty well. I said yes to one small piece of banana cake. When she tried to offer me another I said nah I better not ... when she started to complain saying she baked it especially for me and the least I could do was have another piece. I was totally assertive and said thanks and that piece was delicous!!! Assertiveness is something I'm still in practice with my mother. But I did pretty well I thought

I offered to cook dinner for everyone ... hehe ... cunning me got out the low fat spray and lean beef mince for a vege stirfry. Another situation averted.

Yesterday we went to town to get an eye test done and other stuff. We left early and Bill suggested we get breakfast at McD's ... I agreed before I really thought about it. At the drive through I ordered a Bacon and Egg McMuffen (knowing that was point friendly) but then quickly added in 2 hashbrowns ... hoping the scales didn't hear!! lol. I ate the McMuffin and decided to leave the hash browns till later or feed them to the kids ... yay I did it .. gave them away!!

Had my eye test done ... I'm officially blind as a bat!! Have to wear glasses 24/7. I've needed to wear glasses for driving and watching tv etc for the last 10yrs but now they need to be on all the time. I might actually be able to keep them a bit longer now that they have to be on my face all the time. My kids were forever breaking the others. This time I got some trendy titanium ones. I feel pretty spunky in them. Don't get them till next Friday tho.

While waiting for Bill after my appointment I filled in the time ... umm .. by eating!! In a weak moment I bought an icecream ... but I made sure it was a 97% f/f yoghurt one. I had to laugh because Bill arrived as I started to lick it. We walked past a clothes shop, I decided I was cold and needed to buy a warmer top. Handing my icecream to him I ran in and out real quick. When I got back I asked where my icecream was ... "IN THE BIN!!" He replied ... IN THE BIN????? Apparently it started to drip so instead of licking it like any normal person ... he threw it in the bin ... a big brand new delicious icecream!!! lol At first I was horrified and mad and thought about throwing a tantrum right there in the mall!! lol But a few seconds later I calme down thinking oh well that saved me some points. (to be honest for a split moment i considered saving it out of the bin, now that's desperate!! lol but quickly came to my senses)

Then Bill bought me the coolest pressie!!!! He surprised me while I was at the optomitrist. A Sanyo Smart camera phone!!!!! You know the ones that take photos and have a really cool colour screen!!! I was blown away!! So now there's no excuses for not having any update pics!!!!! He got himself a new phone too but just a normal one.

Then I did a bit of clothes shopping ... a pair of size 12 jeans and 4 tops (all size 12's) And that was on a bloated TTOM day too!!! wahoo I'm still a size 12!!!

Came home yesterday afternoon, worked in the shop till closing (7.30pm) then home for a dinner cooked by Bill... oh I nearly forgot another success ... poured myself a bourben and diet coke ... planning on settling in for night and getting ... ummmm ... blotto!!! lol ... then after one I thought ... nahh ... i actually think I've had enough after one ... that will do me, meaning I kept under points even saving one!! wahooo!!!

So I'm feeling pretty good today ... as soon as the TTOM disappears (stupid huh? anoyed when it doesnt arrive and annoyed when it does!! lol)

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.7kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

ouch!!

I have been knocked to the floor with horrible, horrible ear infection. I went to the doctor yesterday to try and sort it out. Apparently I have what's known as 'swimmer's ear' a condition that is caused by swimming without earplugs.

There must have been some bugs in the water when i went swimming last week and it has caused my ear and gland to swell up with shooting pains 24hrs a day. I'm living on Panadol every 3 hrs and ear drops which for now don't seem to be making any difference. This morning I've woken up with a seized jaw.

I've decided for my website to use this journal instead. So you can all permanently change your links to this page. When I'm feeling a little better I'll transfer all the information over from my website (luckily I still have it saved on hardrive) over to here.

I haven't updated my daily nibbling page the last few days, just haven't felt up to it.

Hopefully I'll start to feel better soon

Lyn
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.7kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

About Me

Hmmm where to start??? ...

I wasn't born fat, much to my discust!! I would love to be able to blame it on that! lol

Average sized baby around 8lb something (can't quite remember back that far)

Grew up eating averagely healthy food ... by that I mean we ate 3 square meals a day ... but ... we lived on a farm where high fat meats were always in plenty supply. We were always told to eat all our veges. Although in hindsight I can see two small problems which maybe turned into big fat ones later on ...

1. We never had much fruit available to eat ... only the sour oranges on the home grown tree

2. Being on tank water (yuck!) we were never forced to drink water and infact all our liquids came from high sugar cordial

But I'm not going to blame this. Nothing can be changed about our history only lessons learnt to pass onto others after us. (not that they want to listen to me lol)

As a child I was teased in school, infact hated school altogether... wished there was some other alternative. Teenage years weren't any better. I tried to get boyfriends ... wished on the fartherest star ... hmmm .... no such luck there. I had friends in school but lets say I wasn't in the most popular crowd. I was FAT after all ... had been since I was around 6 or 7 ... my mother was fat, my grandmother was fat ... figured I couldn't do much about it so lay down and accepted it.

Many a time I decided I was going to be anorexic ... note the term 'decided' ... lol ... I tried with all my might ... with all my desire to be but come 4pm I couldn't starve myself anymore and gorge myself ... I did!!! Infact this became a daily accurance ... starve till 4pm ... gorge till couldn't eat no more! Then sit down and eat full dinner because I was too scared to let on to my parents I was officially an 'anorexic in training!' And of course what did this do to my system?? Killed my motabolism that's what ... right back there at 13yrs of age ... my motabolism died!! I've been grieving ever since!

But seriously folks ...

I vowed at the age of 15 I was one day going to lose weight and teach those arseholes who verbally abused me daily a lesson ... how, when, or with what I wasn't sure ... yet!

There were three boys in particular ... I'll mention later what evil revenge I took out on them in later years!! (breaks into an evil laughter!! lol)

At 17 I left school and went to Art school. I started a romance ... with cookie time cookies!!! I loved them!! Everyday I kissed the morning off with a big fat delicious coooooookie!!!! 6mths later I became that ... a big fat delicous cookie!!

I'd seen others lose weight on Jenny Craig so I piled all my money into an investment to lose my weight once and for all. Oh sure I lost the weight ... and it did take ALL MY MONEY!! lol And I would love to be able to say that was the end of the wonderful fairytale ... but there's so much more juicy gossip after this chapter so don't stop reading now!!

I lost a total of 35kg in just over a year on Jenny Craig. After all how could I go wrong?? They told me what to eat and I ate it ... after all I was very experienced at eating and being told what to eat. During that time I got hooked on the gym bug. Went morning, noon, and night!! It was my addictive drug ... my way of revenge (mwaa haaa haaa ha haaaaa) (just kidding) But in all honesty I thought I would become a world winning body builder, get my name (and body) plastered across the magazines and newspapers of the world and those little idiots from my high school years would see me and be green with envy let alone lust!!! lol ... well that was the plan ... but there was one little itty bitty problem with that plan that I didn't see at the start ....

Bill!! lol

I met Bill. I fell madly in love with this sweetie. At the time I was size 10 ... 65kg ... sexy (if I must say so myself) and my life lived around the gym. But when I met him that's all I wanted to be around ... him ... yeah, yeah I know enough of the soppy stuff!!

Soon the gym took second place and eventually I stopped going. Then I was shown a few good nights out on the town. Wow I had never seen this side of life before. I felt sexy, slim and suddenly I had a life.

So lets get this straight ... my exercise had totally stopped, my eating?? well I wasn't interested in paying too much attention to it anymore ... and I had found ALCOHOL!! At the age of 20 I lived like there was no tomorrow ... and very sadly only two years later all my weight had piled back on ... surprise, surprise????

Over the next 9yrs I married and had 4 children and maintained my huge 100kg weight (impressive huh? lol)

Four years ago my sister secretly joined weight watchers and started losing weight. I saw her start to slim down and she let me in on the secret when I asked. But being the proud woman I am I didn't want to jump on the bandwagon and be a copy cat ... sheesh gimmee a break!! I figured she would put it all back on again ... after all that's what losing weight is all about? right?? well that's all I knew then ... lose weight=gain weight plus more

But two years later she had lost her weight AND kept it off!! Gradually I decided that this weightwatchers thing can't be too bad. Then one day I was talking to her about it and she challenged me to go along to a meeting. I couldn't afford it ... no matter how much I wanted to go ... we were broke (at the time) and $15 a week was just too much to take out of our budget.

Then on my 29th birthday my sister gave me 10wks worth of meetings as a birthday present!!! What a fantastic gift!!! The gift of slimness ... and so much more!!!

So many people have a light bulb moment when everything blurs around them and they decide in the moment in time that the time has come for them to achieve their mission and lose weight. Hmmm sadly this wasn't the case for me ... I just got given these vouchers and felt abliged to go. They'd cost her so much ... the least I could do was to go... couldn't promise I was going to lose weight ... but at least I would go.

So went I did ... and for that first week I just did what I was told... not expecting any miracles... but at my first weighin I lost 1.3kgs!!! .... and the next week I lost another 1.3kgs!! I really felt this was ... well not easy ... it's never been easy ... but simple ... and the feeling of being in control is something I have become passionate about. When I stop eating the weightwatchers way I start feeling out of control and soon enough my weight begins to follow. I still have my splurges, my drinkies every now and then but it's the control I have over my eating that is the secret ... I decide my fate ... not my food!!

Now remember those 3 males I mentioned earler?? The one's I would have my revenge on ... well I always believe in what's goes around comes around ...

bully #1 ... he tried to chat me up when i lost weight the first time ... not knowing that I was infact the fat girl in school he used to tease and throw rubbish at ... and of course I gladly turned him down and told him he wasn't good enough!!

bully #2 ... I went to a school reunion a few months back ... me now at 75kg ... dressed to the nines in my most sexiest clothes and make up I could find. He nearly keeled over when he saw me. I walked up to him boldly as if I had nothing to hide ... as if nothing had happened. And get this ... he is now FAT!!!! HUGE INFACT!!! and married to a fat wife .. not that I have anything against fatness (I certainly know how it feels) but I really see the irony in this situation.

bully #3 ... Saw him at the same school reunion ... and he came up and hugged me saying how georgous I looked. Damn I felt FINE!!! I heard the secret whispers that day ... "wow look at Lynette ... she looks fantastic ... did you hear she's had 4 kids ... you couldn't tell ... wow!!! "

That folks is enough payback for me ....

On the 24th January, 2005 I got to my weightwatchers goal weight of 71kg ... infact kicked it in the butt with a 1kg loss that week bringing me down to 70.6kg.

Now for the next chapter of this journey ... losing the last few kilos to get me down to my personal goal of 65 - 68kg.... then maintaining this weightloss ... the hardest challenge yet!!

That's my life so far ... I'm still on this journey but I'm getting there slowly ... there's no race ... the important thing to note ... I will get there!!!

yeahhhhhhh baby!!!

Wow .... 700g gain at weigh in tonight .... what can I say??? considering I was expecting a 6kg gain! lol ... yeah yeah I know a 6kg gain is imposible but 700g gain is great!!

Now I can start for real!! 75.7kg weight recorded ... I can start from now to get to 71kg ... 4.7kg to go!! here I come!!!

Had a few wines tonight but ate light during the day to save up for it ... came in under points for the day so I'm feeling great.

TTOM has still not shown up but another pregnancy test tonight shows another negative result ... so I'm believing that ... what else can I do??

Not much else to say ... we did the best day yet in the shop on Sunday. Holildays are being good to us.

To all those trying to get into my main website without luck ... they have done the dirty on me and taken my site down ... not sure why yet ... trying to get to the bottom of it. Untill then mark this site as your bookmark.

Till then ...
catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.7kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Day 4 ontrack

I had another succesful day yesterday ... although in recording my points on here I realised I had 19.5pts instead of the alocated 18pts. Even tho i tracked religously on my points calculator all day and thought I was spot on 18pts for the day ... hmmm ... not sure what went wrong there although I'm not too phased about it because I earnt myself 4 bonus points during the day so that should even it out.

Friends turned up in the morning so we all went for a walk along the beach, then I got home had lunch and went to work in the shop for the afternoon/evening. Did just under 10,000 steps for the day ... happy with that.

Made Refried Bean Rolls for dinner last night ... really yum!!

1 Persian Naan bread (cut in half) then on each put shredded lettuce, half cup chilli beans (heated in microwave), salsa and chopped cucumber ...

Then roll up and serve with salad. Makes 2 rolls for only 5pts. I have ingredients left over so might make it again tonight.

Not much to tell about today ... spending it in the shop with Bill all day. I like it when we can work together. Normally when all the kids are here we have to split shifts so one of us can be at home with them. But Jordan (4) is at mum and dads and Lauren (9) has gone to stay with a friend in Auckland for the first week of the holidays. So we only have Malachi (6) and Jese (2) here. Going to trial it with them at the shop ... see how it goes.

Weigh in tomorrow ... I'm quite excited about it but I know it will still be a gain on last weighin even tho my home scales show a huge loss these last few days ... oh well guess that's my fault for not going to get an official weighin last week ... lol

Till tomorrow,
Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.0kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

I'm not often in tears but ...

I have tears in my eyes from reading all your wonderful comments!!! This just doesn't say enough ... THANKYOU!! I don't know how to emphasis this enough ... but you guys are to sole reason I am still going!! And yes I am still going!!!

I was telling Bill the other day how many, many times I've wanted to give up. infact deciding for a day or so that I am giving up. Then I feel guilty about not updating and telling you guys what's been going on. When I first started reading online journals many, many of them just stopped ... no explanation, nothing to say they stopped or put weight back on ... they just stopped updating. And I vowed to myself I wouldn't just stop leaving all my readers just hanging there not knowing what's happened to me. So anyway, after many a time of feeling i've had enough, I've felt guilty about not updating for you guys. So I've come online and then it's hit me .... all your fantastic supportive comments!!! That has inspired me enough to atleast update. Then after updating and letting all my frustrations out, I've felt so much lighter. Like the guilt has gone.

Then I've read all your other wonderful journals and realised that I don't have to feel so bad, that others too go through the same thing, it's all part of it ... nothing abnormal. And that if everyone else can pick themselves up and carry on then so can I!!

You truelly truelly are the whole reason I am still here and a big part of my journey!!!

I haven't updated for a few days because I wanted to show to myself the lightswitch that I had go on in my head on Wednesday was for real and not just a whim. What happened on Wednesday???

A dear online buddy emailed me just to say she was thinking of me and she too was going through the same feelings. We have emailed eachother on and off over the last year or so and I have seen her lose huge amounts of weight. She is in the same situation as me ... very close to goal weight but struggling with motivation to kick those last few kilos up the butt. She challenged me to do this together ... to get our butts to weighin on Monday .. face the music ... then to track, track, track and get ourselves back ontrack!!!

Something switched in my head. I thought yes I can do this ... I have someone to do this with who knows exactly how I'm feeling, who's having the same struggles ... we can do this!! So right then and there I jumped on the scales ... wowsers!!!! 78.5kg!!! (which counts to 81.5kg on ww scales) That's like 6.5kg gain!!! in just two weeks!!! OUCH!! I knew some of this must be fluid retention but it was still disheartening!!

So I got out my old ww books and found a 7day menu plan. I went to the supermarket and stocked up all the food I needed to stick to that menu. I also went for a swim at the hot pools while I was motivated and did lengths of the pool. I only lasted 20mins but it was a good start.

Bill and I had previously organised to go to a trade wine and food festival in Tauranga that afternoon. When we walked in my heart sank at the realisation of what I was about to put myself through. Temptations galore!!! People trying to shove samples in my hand everywhere I looked ... deep fried mushrooms, red wine, white wine, gingerbeer wine, sausages, cheeses ... everything you could possibly imagine. I freaked .. I thought oh noooo my first day ontrack and I'm going to blow it!!!! Then I spotted out of the corner of my eye a sugarfree chupachup stand. I ran and grabbed a sample. They guy probably thought I was a freak!! I unwrapped it so fast and shoved it in my mouth stopped other things slipping in there. It really did the trick. Then the next stand I noticed was Aquashot sports water so I grabbed a sample of that. Then I decided to get my grocery list out and see what I could see here from off my list ... tomato pesto ... I found a catering pack ... perfect!! ... salsa ... another catering pack!! wahoo ... I turned the whole situation around to being a hunt down and find what I actually wanted.

I walked out of there with consuming only 1.5pts worth of tasters... I made it!!! Phew!!

We had subway for dinner and I tried the new vege wrap at only 3pts!!

I finished the day on 19pts with 4pts of exercise done.
Then yesterday we went for a walk along the Karangahape Gorge. I did 21,500 steps ... 3 hrs worth of walking and running.

This morning I stepped on the scales for the first time in 3 days and wahooo it's down to 73.5kg (which is 76.5kg ww scales) so now instead of a 6.5kg gain it's looking at only a 1.5kg gain and I still have 2 more days to go before weighin!!

So for the last 3 days I've been back on track and for the first time in 5mths .... truelly motivated!! I'm tracking, drinking water, exercising ... I've even been updating my eating page ... I'm going to do this!!! And it's all because of you guys!!! You all rock!!!

THANKYOU!!!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW who knows? lol last weighin 75.0kg but probably 76.5kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

hanging head in shame

Thanks so much for all your comments... you guys are such a support to me. I haven't updated in the last few days because I really feel like I've let you all down. I've been downright discusting!!! Sometimes it's easier to ignore the problem than to write on here about it.

I really don't know whats wrong with my head. I think a big part is that for me weightloss needs to be my top priority for me to suceed. I need to be commited and focused. And at the moment my top priority is actually the shop. That's what everything revolves around. By the time I get home at night I am tired and want to just sit down and relax.

TTOM is 9 days overdue now and this put a huge stress on my eating. Not an excuse but a reason for my eating slip ups. I normally go a couple of days over but it's coming up to a six week cycle now. I just feel so bloated and yuck. All the PMS symptoms have been with me for 2 weeks now ... bloated tummy, constant sugar cravings (yeah right working in a dairy surrounded by fat and sugar!!), psycho personality disorder!! Even the cat's had his head bitten off by me! lol

I did a pregnancy test yesterday and I'm definately not pregnant so I guess I just have to wait for my body to chill out and catch up.

Didn't make it to weighin on monday (2nd week in a row now) and yeah yeah I know I need to go ... I really don't require any lectures on this one. But on Monday morning my home scales were showing a 3-4kg gain and I just couldn't face having that recorded.

Anyway I'm here typing so that's a good start!

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.0kg (at last weighin)
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

drifting

I did so well for two days!! No alcohol, no lollies, no fatty food ... then ... my mother came to visit. I loved having her here but she brought with her fatty pastry pies, doughnuts and cheesy buns!! Caught in a weak moment I gave in. I felt physically sick afterwards and knew I'd blown it!

Then last night we went out for dinner and dessert was offered to which I gave in ... again!! Devinely delicous but so rich I went to bed feeling sick again.

I'm so annoyed with myself. I do so well all day and then blow it! I was lying in bed this morning thinking about it and it really feels like I'm swimming against the tide. This is a lifestyle change which I have accepted and have found special treats that are low point to which I reward myself so I don't feel like I'm missing out. The last 18mths I have changed our eating habits and our lifestyles are alot more active. But it is like swimming against the tide ... I can't give up swimming or I'll drift away back to my 107.4kg weight. Every now and then i get tired of swimming, tired of moving my arms and kicking constantly. The last few weeks I have layed back and drifted for a bit which obviously results in drifting back away from my goal.

I'm tired ... 18mths of swimming is a long time!! ... I'm not giving up ... I will make it to goal ... just have to get my energy and motivation back again.

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.0kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

We're off to Sydney!

Aww thanks you guys. Yes I've been extremely busy. Life is existing of working, eating and sleeping at the moment. But I'm enjoying it tho.

We spent yesterday afternoon and evening relaying our drinks fridges in planning for a new double door Anchor fridge arriving today so didn't make it to weighin last night. Before today we have only had a single door milk fridge and we keep running out of milk by the end of the day so this will help alot!

A few days ago we got a new tip top freezer that holds 18 flavours. The old one only held 8 flavours of icecream. It's been a huge hit especially with the kids.

Really not much else to tell ... busy, busy, busy but nothing interesting to say ... lol

Ohhhh nearly forgot to mention ... we've booked our trip to Sydney!! We fly out for 5 days on the 13th October! I can't wait! I'm gutted tho ... Leigh is going to Brisbane right at the time we get there and won't be back till after we fly out :( I'm really sad I'll be missing her but will be great to see my brother and his family again. It's been 3yrs since we last got together and he hasn't seen Jese (2yrs) yet, so that will be fun!

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 75.0kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg