Flu jab ... is it worth it?

So much for having my free flu jab ... I got the flu!!! Almost back to normal now just a nagging cough lurking around.

Still no word on my job application yet, they're taking a while.

Weighin on Wednesday brought a 700g loss. I'm picking my brains to find a strategy to get below the 100kg mark. This one is so physcological for me and I'm not sure why. I keep bouncing around that mark and just can't quite get under it. A big part is that I still feel like I have such a long way to go. Remembering back to when I did Jenny Craig nearly 20yrs ago my start weight was exactly 100kg ... that was JUST my START WEIGHT!!! And here I am 20yrs later still at 100kg!!

With some of my friends stopping blogging I've lost my accountability or more importantly that comrardery, the hype that builds eachother up to get through those tough moments. I really need to sort something out here. The local ww meeting closed down months ago and I don't want to go to SureSlim (too expensive for me). And I get so busy, time is an issue.

I'll have to keep thinking on this one. But for this week I've had my first two days OP so that's a good start.

Gotta get moving

I went to his funeral on Monday and my emotions surprised me. I found myself feeling really angry. It felt like such a waste, he had a beatiful wife and kids and so many people around him who loved him. The room was absolutely packed out!!! There would have been over a thousand people there. We were in a side room with standing room only. So many people spoke of what a fantastic guy he was. Such a waste! His wife came up to me and gave me a hug which was really nice.

Onto the weight front ... yeah a yucky gain this week but I expected it. I can never count points properly when other stuff is going on. 1kg up but onto a good week. No more time mucking around, gotta get to those double digits!!

Ohhhh and I almost forgot ... I played netball last night, first time in over 20yrs!!! And I ran (yes ran!) up and down the courts 8 times!! First time I have run on my ankle since breaking it 18mths ago. It's very sore today but I'm proud ... ohhh and we won our game!! 25 to 7 !! yay!!

Back from AWOL land ...

I've been AWOL from bloggerland the last week. Well I haven't been totally not blogging just not publishing my posts and doing them in draft only. I've decided an the end of the week that I'm not actually going to publish them. It's nothing against you guys but I've had a seriously emotional week and dealing with a lot of very tender personal issues which I feel wouldn't be appropriate to put on here.

Now don't going worrying yourselves about me or my family - we're fine. To give you a basic outline - I went to a job last Wednesday that involved a suicide in which my ambo partner and I were first on scene and we were unsuccessful in reviving him and it really hit home because I knew him. St Johns were fanstastic and had a huge amount of support there for me both immediately after and over the next few days. It affected me big time causing me to have nausea and vomiting for a few days and tossing and turning at night. I think I'm working through it ok, however my emotional stress is nothing compared to what his wife and young kids have to deal with. My heart just goes out to her!!!

Next step is the funeral on Monday which might bring a few emotions back up again.

I found my eating was very minimal over the week as my stomach just couldn't face it. But I tried very hard to eat what I could to keep my energy levels up. I weighed in at 100.5kgs this week which is a good loss but a weighin post last Wednesday just seemed so insignificant with what happened that day. So I've chosen to leave it till today to post.

Now I've worked through some of the stuff (blogging privately helped alot with this) I'm back to 'normal' blogging again.