Monday, May 31, 2004

New Meeting

Going to my new weight watchers meeting tonight. I'm headed for another gain so not sure if I'll weigh or not. See how I feel when I get there I guess.

Hopefully Bill makes it home in time so I can go.

Not much to report. I'm not in a very good head space at the moment. Just can't seem to kick this cloud, but don't want to bore you all with the details.

I'll come out of it eventually, just stick with me here

Lyn
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.4kg
WWGW 71kg

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Life sucks and then there's weight watchers :) lol

Hi Honey ... Im home!! ... guess what?? I got the sack today too!! Too Funny

That's my words to Bill tonight when I got home from my weight watchers meeting. So Funny It Hurts I have to laugh about it now, that's all I can do. After all what else could possibly go wrong ... oops yeah I could get shot! Ouch Lucky I'm not in Iraq at the moment. Honestly (no offence to the Iraquians but I have to have some happy look on life at the moment)

Here's the details ...

My weight watchers leader has always been supportive of my role as a weigher at my meeting. I've been working for weight watchers for over a year now. When I left for Hamilton she said to me I will always have a job when I got back. Heart In Hand And true to her word I got back to Auckland and stepped right back into my role as a weigher for my 5pm meeting.

Over the past year I have swapped from the 6.30pm meeting to the 5pm meeting and so forth depending on the requirements of the meetings and myself.

The lady who does the 6.30pm meeting has always said she is happy to swap with me depending on what the situation is. You Bet

With Bill starting his new job this week we found out that he couldn't get off early on Wednesdays anymore. So I figured I could quite easily swap back to the 6.30pm meeting again (of course with the permission of the weigher wanting to swap with me) Please

Today I tried to get hold of my leader to let her know I couldn't be there for the earlier meeting but continually got the answer phone. Devil So instead sent an email to the other weigher to let her know to pass the message on.

As it turned out Bill got home early so off I went to the early meeting. When I arrived the other weigher had just passed on my message to the staff there. I immediately was approached by my leader to say she didn't appreciate finding out that sort of message from another staff member! No No No I mean come on!!! I had tried to contact her, not like she could be reached!! And then she said it wouldn't be suitable to expect the weigher of the 6.30pm meeting to swap. She didn't want to muck her about!!! She has been a weigher of all about 4 or 5mths!! I have been there for over a year now!! So basically I was told that was it ... NO JOB LEFT FOR ME!! LOL LOL LOL LOL!! I have to laugh - what else can I do?? I can't even hold down the one and only pathetic job I have! lol Loser

I decided there and then that stuff her I'm not staying at that meeting. So I'm going to a different one on Monday night. And if I like it I'm going to change over.

On a good note ... I only put on 600g this week. Was expecting around a 2-3kg gain so I'm happy with that. Goofy

On that happy note ... I'll sign off for now :) And Marilyn (my weight watchers leader) If you are reading this ... HAVE A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS!!! Moony

Was funny ... when I left for Hamilton I got a bunch of flowers and a big thankyou speach Flowers For You ... tonight ??? Nothing No thankyou for the weeks on end I turned up getting paid not even enough to cover my membership fees ... but hey ... that's life ... right??

Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.4kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Monday, May 24, 2004

The car blues

Don't really know why I am updating today as I don't really have much to say. But want to keep my habit up of updating even if I have to bore you all!! lol

Bill started his new job today. He started at 6am ... early start but hoping he will finish early too.

The car situation is a little nerve wracking at the moment. We gave back our company car on Friday and our other car the brakes have gone but we can't afford to get it fixed till after Wednesday (payday) so Bill has taken it to work anyway ... praying he's ok.

So I'm stuck at home today without a car. Have to drop Jordan off to kindy and pick the kids up from school ... hmmm... still don't know how that's going to work without a car! lol... guess I'll sort something out by then. Guess I'll have a good day of walking :)

It's a bizarre feeling not to have any work on. I have been doing wedding stationery for 6yrs and have finally decided to stop it. Basically it was so much work for very little money. Twiddling my thumbs ... bored already!!

Eating has still be eratic. I'm usually like this until I get to a weighin ... find out the bad news then I can move on. That's why it's so important to get to weighin even if I know it's going to be a gain. I can't move on until I know.

Although in saying that I have done quite a bit of exercise over the weekend. Went for an hours walk to take Lauren to netball on Saturday, then yesterday we (the whole family) walked to the petrol station to get some petrol for the lawnmower. 1.5hrs later we arrived home again ... knackered!!! And then!!! ... I mowed the lawns!! Probably 2hrs worth of exercise for yesterday, that's gotta do something for my weightloss (probably not before weighin on Wednesday, but it's all good)

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 72.8kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Friday, May 21, 2004

We had a blast and I MET JO!!!

Wow what a full on week I have had! We left on Monday night after finally finishing my last stationery job around 7.30pm and headed down to mums in Hamilton. Put the kids to bed and chatted for a bit before heading to bed. Then up early the next morning and off to Palmerston North. Got down there around 3pm but no one was home at Bill's brothers so we just drove round having a look at the place. Got back there around 6pm intime for dinner, a few drinkies and off to bed again.

Wednesday we decided (spur of the moment) to ... guess what? ... GO VISIT JO (kiwiJo) IN WELLINGTON!!! I rang her on our way to prewarn her we were coming. The surprise in her voice was amazing!! lol. We got to Wellington around 11am and talked and talked for ages! She's amazing and such a hoot!! Was really bizarre seeing her in real life! Rhian is absolutely beautiful!!! She just lay on her rug and watched the world while we gossiped like a couple of gasbags!! Was the highlight of my trip down there!

Got back around 4pm Wednesday intime to put some dinner on for the Whanau. Then Thursday we had a relaxing day indoors (it was freezing down there!!!) watching dvd's and basically nothing much!

Then this morning we were up at 5am to leave back home. We had to have the company car back by 3pm this afternoon and still needed to clean it out. There was a dusting of snow on the desert road so that was exciting for the kids.

Back home again now and quite happy to be doing not much for the next few days. All my stationery work is finally finished ... my last job completed. And Bill starts his new job on Monday. A whole weekend off ... wahoo ... one of a few since he started his job in November last year.

Quite bizarre to think both Bill and I are unemployed for the next few days lol.

I have to confess my eating was shocking while away and after hoping on the scales this afternoon looks like I'll have around a 1kg gain but hey I had fun and back into it again now that I'm home.

Well that's me for the last week ... I'm off to catch up on what you others have been up to!
Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 72.8kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Monday, May 17, 2004

Had a play with the camera

Big Congrats to Jo ... wahoo so excited for you!! Can't wait to find out all the details!

We ended up having a house full of people here over the weekend and it was fantastic. My brother came round for dinner on Friday night so was good to catch up with him again. He lives in central Auckland but we don't tend to catch up that often.

Then mum and dad came up on Saturday afternoon followed by my sister and her husband Saturday night. They all stayed the night and mum and dad left Sunday morning for a weekend at Hotel de Vin that all us kids shouted them for mum's birthday. Then my sister, her husband and us and the kids went out for a picnic lunch at Totara Park for lunch on Sunday. I went over board on the food side. Even had white chocolate!! Shock horror!! White chocolate is my all time favourite but I just don't allow myself usually because I can't stop at one piece. Consequently more than one piece was had lol.

Took some photos of the kids on the playground. Getting in some practice for my photography. This one below is a shot I took (well actually 5 or 6 shots) and merged them all together into one panoramic photo. If you look closely you can see that there are actually 4 or 5 of each of them in the photo. Tricky huh? lol



and another ...



We're off on holiday tonight till Friday. Will be good to just get away. It's going to be a hugely busy few days but getting out of the house and away together as a family is way cool!! Something we don't get to do too often.

So I'll catch up with you all when I get back on Friday. (won't be having weighin this week, probably a good thing heheh)

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 72.8kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Friday, May 14, 2004

Last day of work for Bill

Bill has his last day of work today. His boss has given him next week off with pay and use of the company car, so we are going to take off for the week and travel as far as we can with the car. Probably stop off at mum and dad's in Hamilton for the night and then go down to Bill's brother in Palmerston North for a couple of nights.

Lauren has a school trip to go to on Monday so we'll leave on Tuesday. Will be nice to get away for a bit and enjoy a holiday before Bill starts his new job on the following Monday.

Had a bit of a blowout last night on the bourben. Too many I think but felt like just letting lose for a bit.

Thanks for all your wonderful comments!! It really cheers up my day :)

Wonder how Jo is getting on ... how exciting!! Can't wait to find out what happened.

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 72.8kg
WWGW 71kg
PGW 65kg

Thursday, May 13, 2004

Damn Fine!!

I have like ... 1.8kg to go to get to goal!!! That's like SO CLOSE!!! I had people telling me this week that I must be stoked how I'm so close to goal but I didn't feel it. 2.2kg to me felt like almost half a stone which in my mind is heaps!! But after weigh in tonight (and a whole 400g lighter!!) I now only have 1.8kg to go and that is like JUST OVER A KILO!! It just hit me tonight that I am actually nearly there!!!! Funny what difference 400g makes! :)

I did my measurements today too ... and I have a couple of cool things to tell ...

1. I have lost over 1.5 METRES!!! in measurements LMAO!!! how bad does that sound!! Well good now but bad that I had that much to lose in the first place

2. I am now down to the 'healthy' waist to hip ratio of 0.79 ... which basically means that my waist is 79% of the size of my hips. They say (whoever they is lol) that anything below 80% is good.

3. I now don't have any measurements over 100cm!!! Wahooooo that's a major for me!!! My hips and tummy (and bust for that matter) have always been over 100cm. But as of tonight they are all under 100cm!!

Here's a comparison of my measurements from start to now ...













Week170
Upper Arm45cm31.5cm
Waist107cm79cm
Hips132cm99.5cm
Upper Leg77cm60cm
Total cm lost0cm152.5cm


Feeling pretty happy with myself tonight .. bought time something good happened

Although in saying that the 'poppa' of a friend of my daughters had a second heart attack in 6wks tonight. Really makes you think what is actually important in life. Yeah we may be going through a few hard times financially but we have a huge amount to be grateful for!!

Catcha!!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 72.8kg (damn that figure looks fine!)
GW 65kg

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

hoping for a loss

Had a really low points day yesterday to make up for the weekend. Hoping it will be enough for a loss tonight. My scales at home are saying a 'stay the same' but they are so inaccurate that I really don't know what that means for weighin tonight.

Had a friend tell me yesterday that the photography business idea we were thinking of she doesn't think will be profitable. She priced it out a while ago and said that the retail shops had such a huge markup that it priced it out of selling range. The small difference we have is that we will be printing the photos ourselves rather than getting a photo lab to print them like she was going to do. Don't know if it will make it much cheaper but you never know. Just have to wait till I can price it all out.

We had an enquiry from Germany yesterday for board but he wants to knock us down in price. Not a good start to have a guy living with us who is already complaining about paying the board. Hmmm ... not sure about that one.

Doing the shopping tonight and it's much needed.

Mum and dad are coming up for the weekend. I'm really looking forward to spending time with them. It's times when things are hard that you need your family around you.

I'll update tonight with weighin results
Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.2kg
GW 65kg

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

4 in the bed and the little one said ...

The comments link seems to be working well. For now I'll stick with it. The thing I like is that each comment stays with that days entry.

It's only a new one and still under construction but when they have finished designing it we will be able to change the colours/fonts and style of the comments panel ... yay that will be fun.

The cat slept in the middle of our bed last night so both Bill and I were cramped over one side of the bed. He got told off a few weeks ago for peeing on my pillow... I rubbed his nose in it. Ever since then he has refused to sleep in our room. So last night I managed to persuade him to sleep with us, so didn't want to ruffle his feathers again by moving him or kicking him off. Then to make matters worse Jordan fell out of bed in the middle of the night and wanted to come snuggle with his daddy, so effectively we had 4 in the bed!! Boy it was cramped!! lol. Hence I woke up this morning with a pinched nerve in my back from trying to lie in an awkward position all night. It's right in the middle of my shoulderblades ... just horrible.

I've noticed the past week or so some new bones :) Especially around my chest just below my colarbones. I think they are called ribs lol but it's been so many years since I have felt them that I'm not quite sure ... heheh :)

Bill bounced into work yesterday and went up to his boss Mr M and asked how his weekend was with a big smile. His boss didn't really know how to take it but I think he was pleasantly surprised. It broke down a lot of walls. Bill said there was no point in being chitty with him ... after all there's enough satisfaction in knowing he's going broke. I'm really impressed with Bill's attitude. Would be very tempting to want revenge. That's what I would be like lol

We have found someone we know that has an overseas student staying with them as a boarder. We're going to look into this option for us then I won't NEED to get a job.

Our car is going to need some serious repair. We have put up with it for the meantime with me only using it to run the kids to school and back just down the road. But now that we are losing the company car Bill will need to use it each day to get to work. Hope it doesn't cost too much.

I originally didn't think I had much to say but look at that ... I filled up a whole page lol

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.2kg
GW 65kg

Monday, May 10, 2004

Lynda's leaving?? :((

not much has happened over the weekend. We had a nice mothers day ... spent the morning going to church, yes shock horror! lol ... first time we have gone to church in a couple of years. We used to be quite involved in a church a couple of years back but things happened and we stopped going. This one we went to was a local one with only 20 or so people there. Nothing hugely evenful happened there but was a nice way to spend a Sunday morning.

My brother has lent me his camera so I can start this photography business until we get enough money to buy my own. He arrives back on Wednesday after being down in Christchurch for 3 weeks, so I'll get started then.

My eating has been eratic the last few days. Probably not very good. Just cant concentrate on it 100% at the moment. Not going off the rails but need to find my focus again.

The tagboard below has been offline for a few days. Apparently they are having a few problems with their server. So stick with it. If you want to send me any messages feel free to fire me an email from the link below.

Well that's about all for today. So sorry to hear Lynda is stopping her journal. Lynda you will be sadly missed!!! Lynda was my first online buddy. She would email me sometimes telling me off, sometimes encouraging me. She's a big part of the reason I am still here!!! THANKYOU SO MUCH LYNDA!! Youre awesome!! I know we'll still keep in contact but the web won't be quite the same without your daily blurbs :(

I'm outa here for today!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.2kg
GW 65kg

Saturday, May 08, 2004

Bill got sacked!!

Now that it's over I can tell you all what actually happened at Bill's work...

His boss whom I will call Mr M was in desperate financial trouble and losing lots of money. He tried in last resort to sack his store manager and get in a new one (Bill) back in November of last year. Hoping that Bill would wave his magic wand and turn all his problems around he waited for Bill to do his thing. When Bill started there was huge staff theft going on (in the thousands of dollars) so firstly he got rid of those staff that he caught out. But the rest of the staff had to commitment to their jobs and there was no staff morale. Mr M had a huge temper so everyone was walking on eggshells around him. So Bill had to build up the staff morale as his next mission. As well as clean up the day to day stuff like 'out of stocks' and shelf ticketing. He got many comments from reps how good the store was looking since Bill had been there. Bill then had to train up new staff that replaced others. All this takes time. And the flow on effect of dollars in the bank doesn't show up immediately. To add to this New World as a whole group is dropping in turnover. Mr M told everyone that they were not to replace any staff leaving because they couldn't afford it. You can't not replace staff. If the staff aren't there then the jobs don't get done, shelves don't get filled and people can't buy the food. Downward spiral getting worse and worse.

So basically because Bill didn't change the profits overnight Mr M decided he was useless and a waste of money so plotted his way to getting rid of him. He couldn't just sack him so he went through the processes of verbal warnings, written warnings (all for things that weren't in Bills controll like staff under Bill not performing, trolleys being stolen, stupid stuff like that)

Then yesterday the shit hit the fan and basically Bill got sacked!! To this day Bill has not done anything wrong to get sacked but because the profits aren't there he has to go.

Luckily we were foresighted enough to read the writting on the walls and find another job in time.

It has crushed Bills confidence tho. In his last job (as Grocery manager) he took his department up 200% in turnover in a matter of 12mths. He is a fantastic manager who is highly respected by many in the industry.

Mr M told Bill yesterday that the role was too big for him. That he didn't have the skills or experience to run a store. I was so wild!!! How dare he say that about Bill. But basically Bill had his hands tied. He couldn't replace staff, the staff that were there didn't want to be there and if people can find cheaper better groceries at another supermarket there's not a lot he could have done.

The interesting thing we have found out now is that Mr M has had 6 store managers in the last 5 yrs!! Hellooo??? something's not right there if you can't get a store manager to stay more than a year. And we know that at least the last two have left after run-ins with Mr M.

Aparently Foodstuffs have been doing a report on the store since September last year and had decided back then that Mr M was not fit to be a store owner and that unless things were sorted they are taking the New World franchise off him.

It was still quite a shock for me when I found out he had lost his job. Even tho we knew it was coming. I had my cry and unfortunately got stuck into a bottle and a half of wine. I was just so frustrated and sad for Bill I needed to do something ... didn't know what ... so got plastered lol. Sounds silly now but we had some fun. Bill and I at home getting plastered and playing Xbox games together.

So I probably went way over in points ... I really wouldn't know.

He has two weeks left at this job ... just want it to go by quickly so we can start the next chapter of our life.

Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.2kg
GW 65kg

Friday, May 07, 2004

Getting back to business

This job hunting thing has really been getting me down lately. It's just so competitive. Every job I seem to be able to get isn't paying enough to even cover the daycare costs so I have to turn it down.

I came to a decision yesterday that finally has me excited. Something I haven't felt in a long time. I'm going to start my photography idea. I had an idea last year about doing portrait photography and fine art photography with photomanipulation. Things like sketchy borders, photo collages, putting faint text over the photos and making a photo into an art piece. The fine art photos (things like photographing flowers, fruit, vases, teddy bears and other objects) I will frame and sell to gift shops. And the portrait photography I will do on contract for people. I have lots of ideas spinning round in my head and just want to get started.

The thing that has stopped me doing it till now has been the lack of a digital camera. But my brother has just bought the camera I was going to get so I'm going to ask him if I can borrow it for 6wks to get started and then when things take off I can buy my own. Gives me a chance then to see how it's going to pan out and so I can get some practice in. I have all the computer equipment and printers here to be able to print it off myself (A3 printer) and I have located a wholesaler framer that sells frames a whole heap cheaper. So a framed print 45cm x 60cm will only cost around $50 and I'm hoping to be able to sell them for around $100-$150 to the gift shops. Still have to price everything out exactly yet.

It was actually the Oprah show that inspired me to do something about this business idea. She had an episode on a few days ago about mums at home that have become millionaires from running a business in their own home. I'm not suggesting I will become a millionaire from this but it's something I am passionate about and as long as it brings us in $50-$70 a week it will be enough.

My eating was fantastic yesterday. I even went to the gym in the morning for the first time in months. Mind you Bill had to push me out of bed to get there and I was pretty grumpy about it at the time lol. But of course thanking him for it now.

My butt is pretty sore today but good to know why. I even drank all my 2 litres of water ... wahoo!!

Bill got given a ticket to the rugby on Saturday at work but turned it down because he wanted to spend his Saturday with me instead ... isn't that sweet? Even with all this pressure and stress we are going through at the moment it's great to know we are as strong as ever together. Something like this has the ability to break alot of couples up. We've had our times of thinking we were going to split up a few years back but coming through it has made us even stronger!! I love my Bill!!

Enough sop for one day lol ... on with my eating ...

Thursday 6th May

Breakfast - 2pts
cereal 1.5pts
skim milk 0.5pt

Snack - 2.5pts
uncle Tobys bar 2pts
Mizone 0.5pt

Lunch - 6pts
soup 2pts
bread 4pts

Snack - 2pts
picking at dinner 2pts

Dinner - 8pts
corn fritters 6pts
oven baked chips 2pts


Total Points used - 18.5pts
Allocated points - 21pts
Water - 800mls
Exercise - 1hr gym workout
Bonus Points - 8pts
Total Bonus Points - 8pts
Points saved - 2.5pts
Total saved - 2.5pts


That's enough ramble for me today
Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.2kg
GW 65kg

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

A bit of good news!! :)

700g gone for good!! Yeeeehaaa!! Very happy result! Considering my past week of not tracking and eating out at the school reunion ... ohh and also with TTOM here.

Not to mention too many wines drinking my sorrows away with my husband. But GREAT!!

My husband has a 6mth contract on his new job so that gives us a little breathing space in buying our dairy. Means we can look around to find the right one and he can leave after 6mths without offending the Chairman of the Board who is in full support of us. If we decide to stay on after 6mths then we go onto another 6mth contract ... cool huh?

Not much else to tell ... haven't heard back from any of my job applications yet. I've applied for another 2 graphic design jobs today. But it's the veterinary one I hope I get.

Weigh in tonight brought me down to my lowest weight yet. Now only 800g to go to get to my 35kg lost mark and only 2.2kg to get to my weight watchers goal. So close yet so far!! This last amount is taking so long to come off. But I'm happy that it is coming off even if it's happening slowly.

Well I'm off to eat my dinner and watch Shortland street and Xtreme makeover!! Great night of tv!!

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.2kg
GW 65kg

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Veterinary Assistant

I've applied for two jobs so far ... a graphic design job in the city and then yesterday afternoon I saw a job going for a veterinary assistant in the same suberb we live in. I have no qualifications but the job said "experience prefered" so I read that as they were willing to take on some who wasn't experienced. I was supposed to send my cv off to a postal address but instead I took it down to the guy personally and introduced myself.

When I was in high school I wanted to be a vet but my parents couldnt afford the education costs at the time (before the times of student loans). So instead I became a graphic designer. This job would be a fantastic experience and a nice change.

Haven't heard about either yet but we'll wait and see.

My eating has been erratic. I just don't have the discipline at the moment to stick to it. Partly to do with TTOM being here and partly with the stress of not knowing what's happening.

Good news is the daycare is cheaper than we imagined at $275 per week for two kids.

Glad to hear Lynda had a great time in Wellington. Leigh and Kimba sounds like your jobs are going through some stress times too. Kim I feel for you in your jobhunting, fingers crossed for you. Karen you are doing really well with your walking, nice to see you motivated again. Wonder if Jo has had her baby yet?

Better get these kids off to school!
Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.9kg
GW 65kg

Monday, May 03, 2004

Back to the 9-5

Looks like I'm going back to work fulltime. Much sooner than expected. It's a long story but basically Bill's job is turning nasty and he's been offered another fantastic opportunity but means taking a $20,000 paycut and losing the car. So either I go back to work or we lose the house.

We have looked at lots of options including buying a dairy but I think for the families sake the best option is for me to return to work. Jese and Jordan will go into daycare which I know isn't the best alternative but Lauren was in daycare for the first two years of her life and I think it did her good. She learnt so much and brought her out of her shell. Anyway there is no real other option except sell the house and that would mess the kids up more shifting schools etc.

I'm applying for a job in the CBD (central business district) of Auckland as a Graphic Designer. It's been so long since I have applied for a job, I'm quite nervous about it. Spent yesterday doing up my cv and I'll send it off to as many as possible today. See what happens.

We've got till midweek to find out if this new job for Bill is going to work out. I'm quite upset about it all really but our hands are tied.

TTOM turned up this morning ... geez great timing ... doesn't help with the stress loads. Probably answers why I'm so strung out about it all. Eating wasn't too good yesterday. Didn't binge or go crazy but didn't track either.

If I get this job we will actually be about $10,000 better off than we are now, even after daycare is taken out. So all will be good if ... ohh if .... I hate if's lol

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.9kg
GW 65kg

Saturday, May 01, 2004

What was I scared of?

The school reunion was an absolute blast!! I walked in with my head held high and proud of who I am. I was nervous of meeting school pupils I hadn't seen in over 15-20yrs. As I walked in I heard some people murmer and whisper ... saying "hey that's Lynette, wow look at her!" I felt so fantastic!!

Today I decided in my head I was going to approach each of the 4 boys that used to bully me in school. One of them continued bullying me from primary right through to I was 15yrs old in high school. I used to consider myself very much a victem but today I was the successful one and held my shoulders back in proud confidence. I bowled up to each one of them throughout the day. I wasn't mean, wasn't attacking just chatted with them as if nothing had ever happened. The worst of them Stephen saw me and gave me an excited hug and continued to chat to me for the next 20mins. It was so surreal and a wonderful healing process. I finally feel I can put my past behind me now. There was no one I felt too ashamed to talk to. I got told repeatedly throughout the two days that I was looking fantastic considering having 4 kids. "How do you do it?" They'd ask. I smiled to myself especially seeing that most of them were fatter than me, some bald, some unemployed but all were friendly and genuinely curious as to what I was upto now. I don't mean that in a revenge way but that I was so scared I was going to be the outsider walking back into a teasing nightmare. But it was anything but.

I'll update more tomorrow but for now I'm exhausted and ready for bed.

Catcha!
Lyn :)
SW 107.4kg
CW 73.9kg
GW 65kg